Unforgiveness: powerful and destructive!
9:00 PM
Today’s
reading: Colossians 3:1-25
As a new
Christian I was aware of the importance of forgiveness, for I was forgiven at
what HIGH cost!
“When you were dead in your sins and in the uncircumcision of your flesh
(worldliness, manner of life), God made you alive together with Christ, having
[freely] forgiven us all our sins, 14 having
canceled out the [a]certificate of debt consisting of [b]legal demands [which were in force] against us and which were hostile to
us. And this certificate He has set aside and completely removed
by nailing it to the cross.” Colossians
2:13-14 (AMP)
I knew this by heart and I thought I would always be a “nice and
forgiving” Christian, until our Heavenly Father brought deep conviction to my
heart on this subject: I was to call my father again, like in the old days when
I was younger and had a tender and forgiving heart. But something was holding
me back. I was lying to myself, trying to cover the sin of “unforgiveness”, as
I excused myself for all the pain that he had caused me “the last time”.
Something so subtle, but that through the years became so powerful and
destructive! Little by little I became bitter, arrogant and a hypocrite!
“But now rid yourselves [completely] of all these
things: anger, rage, malice, slander, and obscene (abusive, filthy, vulgar)
language from your mouth. 9 Do not lie to one
another, for you have stripped off the old self with its evil practices, 10 and
have put on the new [spiritual] self who is being continually renewed
in true knowledge in the image of Him who created the new self— (Col. 3: 8-10)
“Me bitter? But Lord people always tell me how nice it is to be around
me! I’m always positive and encouraging, am I not?” (Heb.12:14)
Finally, our Heavenly Father in His amazing Grace gave me the final
opportunity: I flew home to visit mother, and on my last day in town I called
my father asking to see him. I could tell over the phone he was excited to see
me again. I was going to have lunch with a friend of mine and I asked him to
join us! We had a wonderful time, remembering old times, and we even took a
picture of us together! Later, that afternoon I confessed to my friend the
reason I had delayed this encounter with my father. It was so freeing to
confess to her and My Heavenly Father that I had been living in bitter unforgiveness
for so many years!
Paul reminds us how we are to live:
“So, as God’s own chosen people, who are holy [set
apart, sanctified for His purpose] and well-beloved [by God Himself], put on a
heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience [which has
the power to endure whatever injustice or unpleasantness comes, with good temper]; 13 bearing
graciously with one another, and willingly forgiving each other if one has a
cause for complaint against another; just as the Lord has forgiven you, so
should you forgive. 14 Beyond all these things put
on and wrap yourselves in [unselfish] love, which is the
perfect bond of unity [for everything is bound together in agreement when each
one seeks the best for others]. 15 Let the peace of
Christ [the inner calm of one who walks daily with Him] be the controlling
factor in your hearts [deciding and settling questions that arise].” (Col.
3:12-15)
The lack of forgiveness can be devastating to our
souls; it is a very serious matter:
“Our
relationship with our fellows and our relationship with God are so linked that
we cannot disturb one without disturbing the other. Everything that comes
between us and another, such as impatience, resentment or envy, comes between
us and God. These barriers are sometimes no more than veils - veils through
which we can still, to some extent, see. But if not removed immediately, they
thicken into blankets and then into brick walls, and we are shut off from both
God and our fellows, shut in to ourselves. It is clear why these two
relationships should be so linked. "God is love," that is, love for
others, and the moment we fail in love towards another, we put ourselves out of
fellowship with God - for God loves him, even if we don't. But more than that,
the effect of such sins is always to make us "walk in darkness" -
that is, to cover it up and hide what we really are or what we are really
feeling.” (The Calvary Road- Roy Hession)
A few months later I found out my father was diagnosed with terminal
cancer. Our Heavenly Father granted me
the privilege to lead him to Jesus, His only and sufficient Savior. For the
last months I would pray for my father over the phone and even had the opportunity
to see him in the hospital before he was taken Home.
Unforgiveness is powerful, but there is greater power in extending forgiveness: it will not only heal a
relationship, but it will also bring healing to you and the other person!
Our Heavenly Father is Faithful! He is only waiting for you to take that
first step: confess your lack of forgiveness and ask Jesus, the
ultimate forgiver, to empower you, remembering that he has forgiven you.
Blessings my
sisters!
Mari
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